College Life
Part 17: Definitions

by Greenbeans <gbeans@tyrlen.org>


Disclaimers:

A repeat of 16, but this is a continuation of that story.

I've tried to keep this series relatively light, but this 
one isn't.  All kidding aside, this one does hit upon a 
serious subject.

I want to re-emphasize (especially for this one) that the 
author and the character are two different entities.

Cursing.

Comments, thoughts, complaints, compliments, ramblings, and 
flames are all accepted.  But the latter two stand a 
serious chance of being printed out and turned into rat 
cage lining.

All characters are property of their respective holders.  I 
belong to myself, thank you, and have a nice day :)

********** Sunday **********

Michiru had checked in on Beans and Haruka to discover that 
they were both asleep on the bed.  It was an odd discovery 
to make.  There had to be an explanation for it.  She would 
get it from Haruka when she woke up.

The good thing was that she no longer got the feeling of 
fear that she'd been receiving from Beans.  No, now it was 
replaced with something else.  It was from a deep wounding.  
She was in the dark as to what it could be.

It was 9am before Haruka left the guestroom.  Though she 
wasn't a morning person, Michiru could usually coax a 'good 
morning' out of her before she had her first cup of coffee.  
This morning Haruka woke up late and went straight into the 
shower.

Twenty minutes later she came into the kitchen dressed in 
jeans and a tee shirt.  Michiru started breakfast when 
Haruka left for the shower.  Michiru handed a cup of coffee 
to her before Haruka spoke.

"Good morning," she said as thickly as the drink that she 
held in her hand.  "Michiru, we need to talk."

*****

Michiru leaned back into the dining room chair with a 
thoughtful pose.  It was a ruse to hide the emotions that 
were clearly seen within her eyes.  Disbelief, horror, out-
rage, and shear anger that anyone would dare such a thing.

Haruka sat besides her with downcast eyes.  Her voice had 
thickened to the point of speechlessness several times 
during her explanation.  Michiru reached out to stop her 
pain, but Haruka wouldn't accept.  That made her want to 
cry even more.

"I'm not the one that needs help," Haruka spoke softly.  
"I'm not the one," she finished in a whisper.

"I don't need your sympathy," Beans stumbled into the room 
slowly and sat once she made it to the table.  She turned 
to Haruka.  "I'm sorry to have bent your ear last night."

Her voice was mild.  She wasn't being defensive, just 
stating a fact in her mind.  She didn't appear to be as 
weary as she was previously.  The bags under her eyes were 
receding, but she needed more rest.

"You should be in bed," Haruka ignored her apology.

Beans snickered some.  "How am I to sleep without you?"

Haruka flushed red while Michiru coughed discreetly into 
her hand.  "Suffer ungrateful child," Michiru said with a 
slight smile to take the sting out of her words.

Haruka wouldn't get away with doing that two nights in a 
row; even if it was for a good reason and nothing happened.  
"Would you like some breakfast?"

"A little would be nice," Beans answered sleepily.

It was a quiet meal.  Haruka kept on staring at Beans, and, 
when she would look up, Haruka would look down at her 
plate.  Haruka had been affected by what happened last 
night more than she would to admit.

Michiru looked over at Beans herself.  It seemed that she 
hadn't eaten a bite for a couple of minutes.

"Beans, are you alright?"  She asked politely.  There was 
no response.

"What?"  Haruka got up from her seat to take a look at 
Beans.  "She's asleep."

Indeed, Beans had fallen asleep with her spoon resting in 
her oatmeal and head slightly lulled to the side.

Haruka took the spoon out of her hand before picking her up 
carefully.  Michiru got the door to the guestroom opened 
and the bed covers thrown back by the time Haruka made it 
in with her burden.  She laid the girl down onto her side 
facing away from them.

"Michiru," she knelt down besides the bed and motioned for 
her to do the same.  Gently she pulled Beans' shirt up.

"Haruka!"  Michiru protested her lack of manners.

Haruka waved her off.  "Look here," she uncovered her back.

She gasped audibly at the scars that formed a criss-
crossing pattern on her back.  Lightly she traced one of 
the thicker markings with her fingertip.

"Oh god," the revelation rocked her.  This could have been 
Hotaru on the bed.  That thought caused her to lose her 
balance and land on the floor.

"Hime-chan," Haruka echoed the thought in a whisper.  "Bad 
enough that some son of a bitch did this to our friend, but 
if it had been Hime-chan, I would have nothing against 
killing the bastard."

Beans swatted behind her annoyed, for Haruka still had her 
shirt hiked up.  She sleepily grabbed onto the cloth and 
pulled it against her.

"Lemme alone ya hentai," she mumbled in her sleep before 
rolling over onto her other side.

Haruka helped Michiru up off the floor.  They returned to 
the kitchen with Michiru still mulling over what she had 
seen.  No wonder Haruka was concerned for Beans.  Scars 
like that weren't only skin deep.  From what she'd been 
told, it sounds like the wounds on the inside have yet to 
be fully healed.

*****

Haruka returned to bed not long after that.  She was half 
tempted to join her.  Beans' fever may have broken, but 
that didn't mean that she was immediately well again.

Michiru entered into the room hosting their friend.  The 
curtains were pulled away to let the weak winter sunlight 
to stream in.

"On days like this, I wish I were back home," Beans spoke 
softly.

She turned her attention away from the gray landscape to 
look at her.

"I would spend the mornings outside playing in the snow 
with my brother and sister.  Then mom would call us in for 
lunch.  We'd sit in front of the fire letting its warmth 
bake us dry," the expression on her face was gentle as she 
reflected on the memories.  Her eyes were half closed, 
though not from want for sleep.

"You care for them very much," she observed.  Beans sat 
herself upright to give her space to sit on the edge of the 
bed.  Michiru tucked Beans' in tighter before sitting.

"Yes," she closed her eyes while taking a deep breath, "I 
assume that Haruka told you about last night.  My being 
adopted and all."

"She did.  Is that alright with you?"  She laid her hand 
lightly onto Beans' legs.

"It's fine.  I don't know why I even told her that.  I was 
just -- scared by my dreams.  Silly, huh?" She laughed 
shakily.

"Silly?!  I would never call fear 'silly'.  Fear is a very 
real thing.  It should be brought out into the light so 
that it can be put down.  Perhaps that is why you told 
Haruka -- to finally defeat the fear?" Michiru smiled 
reassuringly.

"Perhaps," she whispered.  Beans broke eye contact with her 
to watch outside.  Michiru saw the tears forming in her 
eyes.

"Ara!" Michiru surged forward to bundle her up into her 
arms.  Beans leaned her head onto her shoulder crying 
silently.  "Mame-chan!"  She pulled the girl into her, 
trying to give her a strong pillar to lean against.

"I'm sorry, Michiru, I'm sorry for being so weak," she 
choked out softly.

"Who says that you're weak?"  She embraced her tightly.  
"Not I, and certainly not Haruka.  You are one of the 
strongest people that I know."

Beans shook her head in disbelief.  She tried to pull away 
from her, to recess into herself again, but Michiru 
wouldn't let her go.

"Don't hide, Mame-chan.  Please don't hide from us.  Trust 
us," she stroked her fingers through Beans' hair.

"I do trust you," she said slowly.  She leaned her head 
back against the headboard and drifted asleep again.

"Right in the middle of our conversation too," Michiru said 
softly.  She positioned Beans so that she looked more 
comfortable.

There was nothing for her to do here but wait.  She left 
briefly to retrieve her sketchbook.  While Beans slept, she 
made rough sketches of the form before her.  The sketches 
would probably never be used for anything, but she did like 
to practice drawing the human form.

Michiru found herself driven to distraction by Haruka's 
earlier words, '... if it had been Hime-chan, I would have 
nothing against killing the bastard.'

She couldn't deny that she felt the same way.  Anyone who 
dared to harm her precious daughter would find themselves 
in a world of hurt.  Then she might kill them if she was 
feeling merciful.

A morbid part of her wondered how those scars were created 
in the first place.  What could cause scarring like that?  
Belt?  Switch?  Whip?  The possibilities caused her to 
shiver.  She was experiencing a sympathetic fear.

With a sigh, she resumed work on her sketch.

*****

I yawned, then stretched out fully before nuzzling back 
into the warmth of the bed.  The desire to leave the bed 
was a recessive one, but nature was demanding and I 
couldn't delay such callings forever.

Slowly I stumbled to the doorway and out to the bathroom.  
I wondered briefly where Haruka or Michiru were.  They'd 
seemed insistent on being by my side, but they weren't 
anywhere that I could see from the hallway.

After I was finished with my business, I came out of the 
room to hear voices in the kitchen.  I wandered out that 
way to find Haruka putting away some groceries.

"What's up?" I asked.

"You are and you shouldn't be," she scowled slightly.

"Easy enough to fix," I sat down at the table.  

She shook her head.  "Close enough."

I watched her as she put away the groceries.  One box, then 
another, a can, then some fruit into the fridge.  Silently, 
no chatter, no smart comments, just the everyday task of 
putting her purchases away.

"What's gotten into you, Haruka?"

"Nothing," she mumbled from behind the refrigerator door.

"Haruka.." I said in a tone that called her bluff.

She closed the door with more force then needed.  "How 
could someone do that to you, Beans?  How can someone be so 
heartless as to hit their own child?!"

"I don't know," I answered slowly.  "All I know is that bad 
things happen to good people, and that evil doesn't always 
lose."

Her eyes fixed with mine.  "Aren't you angry?"

"I suppose a part of me is, but anger won't help any.  
What's done is done and that isn't my life anymore."  

A tear began to form in the corner of my eye.  "I'm going 
back to bed now," I fled the room with as much dignity as I 
could muster.

*****

Haruka knocked softly on the bedroom door.  Technically, it 
was her house, she could enter if she wanted.  Under other 
circumstances, she would have done just that, but not this 
time.  She wanted to apologize to Beans, though she wasn't 
entirely sure why.  If for nothing else, then for making 
her friend cry.

"Come in," was the call from inside.

She opened the door and proceeded in.  Beans was curled up 
in the bed in a restful looking position.

"I wanted to apologize," Haruka said.  She was never one 
for beating around the bush, and now certainly wasn't the 
time to start.

"What?"

"I made you cry, and I'm sorry," Haruka pulled the chair 
next to bed into a better position for holding a 
conversation.  She leaned forward with her forearms on her 
knees.  "I'm sorry, Mame-chan, I don't know what else there 
is to say.  No one should have to face what you have, no 
one."

"No, they shouldn't," Beans repositioned herself for a 
conversation.  "But life isn't fair.  I've been happy since 
then, so that's what I focus on," she smiled slightly.

"I couldn't do it, if I were you," Haruka admitted softly.  
"Move on so easily, I mean.  I..."

Beans placed a hand over hers.  "Don't worry about it.  
It's in the past where it belongs."

"I can't," Haruka growled slightly, "I can't when I think 
of what it must have been like.  I feel my blood boil with 
anger.  I care about what happens to you, and the thought 
of someone hurting you makes me want rip them in half."

"Haruka," Beans said her name slowly, considering her next 
words carefully before continuing.  "There are many types 
of strength.  Some you are familiar with like physical 
strength, strength of character, and the power of love," 
Beans' eyes creased together as she smiled slightly.

"I'm building myself in those areas, but there are some 
strengths that I have that you are still building.  The 
strength of healing is one that I'm quite familiar with, 
and the ability to forgive those who wrong me."

Haruka gasped at Beans' reference to forgiving.  Memories 
of Usagi and her kind heart flooded her.  Feeling of shame 
for her and Michiru's actions after the defeat of the Death 
Busters returned.  They had attacked Usagi because they 
didn't understand the power of forgiveness.  Even after 
they had wronged her, Usagi forgave them.  It was a truly 
wondrous thing.

She sat silently for several long minutes before answering.  
"I know of a person whose strength is forgiving.  Thank you 
for reminding me."

"Justice is best served with a measure of mercy.  Mercy 
requires the ability to forgive.  I'm satisfied knowing 
that, for myself at least, justice will be tempered with 
mercy.  I wouldn't want it any other way."

Haruka snorted.  "So I'm sitting here making a fool of 
myself."

Beans shook her head.  "Not at all.  It's a humbling thing 
to know that I have friends who would defend me so 
fiercely," she grinned broadly.

Laughing lightly, she got up and ruffled Beans' hair 
playfully.  "You've got that right.  Now get some rest, we 
have classes tomorrow after all."

"Augh!" Beans flopped back on the bed.  "Kick a girl when 
she's down."

"It's my form of mercy," Haruka winked before closing the 
door slowly behind her.

********** End part 17 **********

Firstly, I would like a apologize for breaking away from 
the set theme of 'College Life', which is comedy.  I'm 
not really sure what possessed me to write these last two
stories except a desire to expand on the characters of 
Haruka and Michiru.

I have really struggled when it came on deciding whether 
to release these two stories or not.  I know that the basic 
good nature of people will cause them to write me and ask 
if it's true or not, and I didn't want people to get the 
wrong idea.  I was also very wary of seemingly doing a 180 
with the tone of the series as a whole.

It's only with the convincing of my friends who read this 
when I asked them "what was I *thinking*?!" that has 
brought this it the net as a whole.  I have gone back and 
forth on distributing this more times than you could 
imagine.  I've decided to just go with it, and hope the 
story flies.

Thank you for reading this.
